My Immortal: Reloaded
by UniqueTeen
Summary: Have you ever thought 'What would Tara/Todd Giliesbie's Famous My Immortal be if converted to be readable', if so, then this is it. This is My Immortal with less grammar mistakes, less angry Dumbledore, and less wrist cutting. Is Ebony the same Hot topic loving, prep hating vampire that we all love/hate/cry over at the butchering of the English language? See within to find out.


Hello? Is anybody actually reading this?

Look. The only reason that I am writing this, is that the Blonde Ponce dared me to do it. (Draco Malfoy). Apparently, as I moan about my life every second of every minute of every hour of every day to Drakiekins, he had gotten fed up, so here I am, writing into a bloody book.

I've never written a diary (or is it journal?) before, so I shall start at the basics.

My name is Ebony Way. (My full name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. No, I am not lying. Yes, my parents were insane when they named me. And yes my name is a diease. I believe it is called a 'goth' phase. And if you call me by my full name, you won't see the next dawn. Got it?).

I was born Seventeen years ago, by a halfblood and a pure blood. I'm also a vampire. (Don't ask how I became one. And no, Dracula had nothing to do with it.) Somehow, despite my half-breed status, I attend Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I'm in Slytherin House (which didn't improve my reputation, by the way), and despite being evil and in the house of the Snakes, I have a guilty secret of enjoying Muggle related stuff. (Music, books, clothes, you get the idea.)

My appearance? As I am considered as a social outcast (Vampire + Slytherin = OMG! THIS GIRL IS YOU-KNOW-WHO'S DAUGHTER / WIFE / WHORE! LETS IGNORE HER, AND HOPE SHE DOESN'T RAPE US IN OUR SLEEP!), I don't give a flying fuck on what other people think of me, so I tend to stand away from the crowd. I have mid-back length black hair, with red tips at the end. (It was a prank by the Weasley's, and now the dye won't come out. I've even tried cutting it –my hair, not my wrists-. I've grown to like it.) Anyway, my hair clashes with my icy blue eyes. (THOSE ARE THE EYES OF THE DEVIL! My peers cry out.) Oh, I also dress as a Muggle, to add an extra nail to the already built coffin.

Unfortunately, I have several stereotypical attributions that people connect to vampirism. My teeth are pearl white and pointy. (All the better to eat you with! And not in the sexual way, you perverts.) I have albino skin. (Not because I burn up, I just don't like going outside much). And I have to drink blood. (Human, animal it doesn't matter. If I don't get a refill at least once a week, I go into a catatonic state, and eventually die. Bit not good.). I can, surprisingly walk on holy ground, and over holy water. Also, I DO. NOT. FUCKING. SPARKLE! Nor do I have a lover / brother named Edward Cullen. Ask Cedric Diggory, not me okay?

Anyway, my story begins somewhere within the middle of the Christmas break. It was a weekend, and had been snowing outside; I remember, so the grounds of the castle was quite crowded. After I got changed into my winter clothing, I left the common room, and went outside (Shock horror!), and began heading towards Hagrid's hut.

One fault of mine, I recognise is paranoia. Now, while I am no Mad-eye 'CONSTANT VILLIGANCE' Moody, I do know when people are looking and speaking about yours truly. And guess what? As I was walking to my destination, students from all years tried (and failed, might I add) to discretely gossip about me.

I was right. If I could have given myself housepoints, I would have awarded 5 Points to Slytherin for knowing your surroundings.

What were the twats saying, you ask? "Did you know that Ebony Way is related to Dracula? Apparently, as his niece she has been married to you-know-who, and has been told to kill us all!" "Apparently the bitch is the wife to Edward Cullen!" "She is going to kill us all!". Blah blah fuckin' blah. You get the point.

Couldn't they come up with better insults? I could go to a freakkin' muggle primary school and get better insults. A muggle school, where they believe that us witching folk are green and are allergic to bloody water.

I am not the first to admit it, but I do have a slight temper. By slight temper, I mean I posses a very, very short fuse, that once lit, everyone within a mile radius should hide or suffer the wrath of a hormonal vampire.

Guess what they did? They lit my fuse.

And before I knew it, insults were flying out of my mouth like a wasp finding honey.

"Oi!" I shouted, and to my satisfaction several heads turned to my direction. " For fucks sake, I know I am a vampire. No, I do not know why Fudge allowed me to this school. Yes, it is for one year only. For those that do not know, one year equals twelve months. No, I will not do a 'Dracula' as vampires require blood that comes from creatures with more than one brain cell, which you bunch of idiots do not even share." I paused for effect. "NOW SCRAM!"

And just like that, I stalked away with dignity (which is possible fyi) away from the gathering crowd of idiots that wanted to see the vamp get put into place. If this is what magical Britain had for its next generation, then this island was doomed.

They were, if I can release my inner sarcastic American within me, the classic definition of a _prep._

Just because I was classed as a dark creature from some inbred bastards, didn't mean I don't have feelings.

Bastards.

And before I knew it, myself and my swear filled thoughts had managed to reach the edge of the forbidden forest, (by Hagrid's hut, I should add) and I had been staring into space for some time.

"Hey Ebs, what's up?" asked a mysterious voice to my right, which caused me to jump, and the voice to snicker (which it did, despite hours long arguments later over the fact)

I turned around, and braced myself for a hoard of Gryffies with stakes in hand (trust me, it has happened on more than one occasion. They believe that if they 'Kill the beast' –their words, not mine – then they would get house recognition. Fucktards)

Instead of a swarm of angry idiots, I found myself next to the Blonde Prince of Slytherin. Never before had I been more glad to see his face.

"Jesus below, Draco. You scared the shit out of me!"

"Nawwww did I scare the big bad evil vampire?"

In response to that, I swatted the back of his head with my hand.

"OW!"

"Serves you right," I said "Next time I'm gonna send my big bad evil teeth into your puny mortal neck. Then see who has the last laugh, Mister I'll-tell-my-father-about-this"

Draco sighed, and rubbed the back of his head which was now vacant of my stinging hand (hitting his head hurt, all the ego must have made his skull fat)

"Are you ever going to stop reminding me about the phase I went through?"

"Never" I smirked

"I was twelve. TWELVE!" The ponce cried. "I was in second year, and you didn't even go to this school!."

I snorted. "Whatever floats your boat, ferret boy." I could see him at the corner of my eye scowl at that, which made my give a slight smirk in return. "What do you want, then?"

"What makes you say that?"

I raised an eyebrow in response. "It is the winter holidays, and instead of commanding your army of evil followers to take over the world, you are here with little old me. Why?"

Draco laughed outright at that. "World domination? So last centaury. I heard from unreliable sources that you told the slayers to piss off. Is that true?"

( Slayers is what Draco, myself and a few others have called the anti-vamp squad. The people who believe that I am satan reborn. I believe it is a fitting name.)

"Yeah, your source is right. How did it travel to the castle so fast? It happened, like five minutes ago…" I trailed off.

" I think you mean two hours ago."

"Oops?" I exclaimed "time must have gotten the better of me. I humbly apologise."

I flinched at the sudden arm that had managed to loop its way around my neck.

"Don't worry Eb's, about the rumour mill. I know for a fact that this time the rumour mill will be gossiping about Crabbe and Goyle's secret affair."

To this day, I do not know how I managed not to choke on my own spit after hearing that.

" And how Mr. Malfoy, do you know that?"

"Well Ms. Way, I'm ashamed that you don't have your complete and utter trust in me!"

At this, I managed to shrug off the warm limb off my neck, and turned to face Draco so we would be standing face to face, despite the fact that he was a good inch taller than me.

The expression on my face must have said enough, because Draco had a grin on his face, and managed to puff out his chest in a mock impression of a muggle super hero.

"The reason I know about the oncoming rumour is because a misplaced word here and there by yours truly."

I could feel my eyebrows raise. Again. It seemed like Draco had that effect on me.

"Says the person that used his father to _bribe_ his way onto the quidditch team in second year."

Draco winced, much to my personal satisfaction.

"You love bringing back bad memories of second year, don't you."

I nodded in agreement, and smirked suddenly as an idea fell into place inside my wicked mind.

"Bribing your way onto the quidditch team wasn't very ambitious or cunning, now was it? Ambition and slyness are part of the Slytherin Traits, which you did not show. I believe, that as your father gave state of the art brooms to the school – which must have cost an arm and a leg for a bulk supply.- That dear Malfoy is Loyalty. Loyalty isn't connected to Slytherin now is it? It is connected to Hufflepuff house. As you did not show any Slytherin traits, but Hufflepuff, I believe that you Mr. Malfoy should be a duffer."

That got a positive reaction. The Malfoy heir looked me in the eyes, his own silver ones wide. "Ebony if I was placed in Hufflepuff in first year, my father would have done five things. First, he would have publicly disowned me, in front of the PureBlood circle. Second, he would burn every possession I owned, owls and house-elves included, and would have made me watch. Third, he would have bound my magic, and made me a squib. And lastly, fifth, he would have obliviated me, and left me in a Muggle orphanage to rot."

Only at the last sentence did I realise that my mouth was hanging open, in a good impression of a goldfish.

"Sweet below, Draco. Surely your father wouldn't have been that bad."

" I know that would have happened Ebs, shall I tell you how?" At this point he paused, and I realised that he was no longer looking at me, but at a spot in the distance behind where I was standing. "Because he told me that himself, before I was sorted."

I gulped at that revelation. Never in our half year of knowing each other, had Dray been so open. When the topic of family rises, my companion closes off, and moves the conversation to a different topic. I felt ashamed at myself for not realising the problems in the Malfoy family sooner.

It was time to move onto a lighter topic.

"How about this: We go to the Slytherin Common Room, and you can tell me how you managed to release the biggest scandal Hogwarts has seen since it was revealed that Dumbledore plays for the same field."

Draco smiled then, his façade carefully in place. If I hadn't seen the way he had a semi-breakdown only a second before, I wouldn't have realised it was there.

Draco broke into a run. "Race you to the castle, last one there has to chew garlic!"

And with that, I lost saw Of Draco Malfoy's image, as he ran though the snow, giggling madly. How could a person be depressed one second, and happy the next?

Mortals were weird.

And with that thought, I turned my back towards the forest, and started to pace out the footsteps Draco took. By the time I would make it to the castle, Draco would already be at our common room, but I didn't care.

Sometimes it really sucked to be a vampire. ( pun intended)


End file.
